Things have been a bit amiss lately. Kids are back in school, both of us are incredibly busy with work, friendships and starting a new business venture; there just hasn’t been much time to focus on us or our domestic discipline goals and commitments. When we are practicing and being consistent, we are both better for it. When it slowly starts to fall off, we both slowly start to feel it until it is stifling to consider going forward without getting back to these basics.
We have obviously reached that point. JP asked me to come up with some ideas for a new format and ideas for 21 days of submission – role adjustment & submission training. Below are the things I have come up with so far. When we finalize a plan and I have developed the “token bank,” I will repost. If anyone has any ideas or specific things that work for them, please comment and let me know! Thanks in advance.
21 DAYS – RENEWAL 1
The next 21 days will be used to reset our perameters, set new goals and reach new heights in our DD – D/s relationship. I propose the following ideas/actions for use in our renewed 21 Days of Submission & Role Adjustment.
1. Tokens of Submission
Each day I will “give or perform” one act of submission that can be chosen from a “Token Bank,” that I will provide or as assigned by you. This doesn’t limit the activities that can be assigned, it just creates a standing list up front. *If any issue will prevent me from completing this token on any given day, I will let you know as soon as the issue arises.
2. DD Binder – Create a tabbed binder that will serve as a storage space for any documents we create, assignments/essays I complete, progress logs from weekly review meetings, etc.
3. Assignments – Essays, writing exercises or any other type of higher-level thinking exercises that are assigned in advance with due dates. These exercises should serve to replace or added in addition to journaling, but with a focus on things you want to work on, things you want to learn about me, or things you want me to research, study or provide a view-oriented essay on. This will give you all kinds of fun opportunities to get me focused on digging deeper, thinking more about us and studying the art of submission.
4. Implement Inventory
(Due by X-X-XX assigned date)
Photograph and Document Implements. Arrange by category in a 3 ring binder. Provide pain scale rating and accurate recommendations for use (i.e., best for punishments due to strong sting and intense thud. OR – perfect for maintenance; encourages focus, but doesn’t hurt severely enough for punishment. OR – can be used lightly as a toy or for light maintenance, but used with any amount of real force or medium force for an extended time, this implement should be reserved for only the worst of punishments.)
5. Fantasy Fiction Fridays
Every Friday 3500 – 5000 word literotica short story due to JP. He chooses the topic 7 days in advance, I write the story. Due by noon (by email) each Friday.
Develop confidence building exercises, tokens of submission and assignments
These can include a wide variety of things. Ideas are: written assignments; poetry, artistic renderings, research, scavenger hunts, mundane tasks (that need to be done – not just to be mundane for the hell of it), sexual favors, role-definition discipline spankings, etc.
2. Weekly Review
Conduct a weekly review every Sunday at 8 PM. Kids in bed, ready for bed ourselves by 8 PM…we meet to discuss the week, the rules, the good and bad and what can and will be improved. We review the calendar for the following week and add to it if necessary. Schedule maintenance and any other activities, discuss any feelings or suggestions.
3. Maintenance – Develop and stick to daily maintenance schedule to include maintenance of discipline and submission. Geared toward success and love.
RULES AND FOCUSES
Work with me to address a list of 2 or 3 MAJOR categories to work on during the 21 days. Keeping the list shorter helps to ensure success and follow-through. Major categories could be things like MONEY and HOUSEKEEPING or PROCRASTINATING and NEW BUSINESS. Or whatever. We will work together to define that list, and then we can think of specific rules and exercises.
Top Ten Reasons
Each of us write down our top ten reasons for enjoying our DD – D/s position. For instance, Me
#10 – I am a woman and you are a man, it feels natural and flows into our intimacy and bond as a couple for me to submit to you physically, mentally, sexually, and spiritually.
2. Lists of Preferences
A learning activity focused on our own preferences and how we can better meet each others needs through understanding preferences.
-Each will develop a list of preferences…list 10-15 things that really matter (irritate you, hurt your feelings, frustrate you, etc.) and how you would prefer they be handled/dealt with/overcome. This will only be helpful if done in a constructive and realistic way. These lists will be kept and referred to.
3. Love Inspiring Characteristics
A list of five to ten most incredible things we have learned about each other since beginning domestic discipline or in the last year.